A few years ago, God prompted me to focus on the word 'faith'. I went nearly an entire year without doing much with it. It wasn't until I entered the fourth quarter that the proverbial light bulb went on. I'm sometimes a little slow on the uptake. 2013 is a different story. Twenty days into the new year and I'm already experiencing radical internal change around the word he gave me--love. It's all good stuff, but I hope I've not peaked too early. I'm not sure I can sustain this pace of transformation. Poor Construction![]() Over the weekend, God took on quite a demolition project in me. Walls I'd been constructing over the last couple of years (maybe decades) sustained serious damage. The rubble isn't cleaned up yet, but I can see over the jagged remains into a place of deeper love and greater freedom. It didn't come easy. There were little fits (and some big fits) and hemming and hawing. Until finally, it seemed he simply breathed on the wall and exposed it's structural inadequacies. Apparently that wall wasn't really even protecting me. Go figure. Photo Credit: Rozab Botts A new dayToday I feel...relieved. And exposed. Tired. Hopeful. Softer. But now what? Keeping people out is hard work, but it's got nothing on the difficulty of opening myself up to more pain. Today I decide whether I rebuild the wall or continue demolition. Seems an obvious choice. But it is a choice.
Goodbye wall.
2 Comments
Karen L. Black
1/22/2013 05:50:33 am
Woukd you feel it strange for me to say that I grow to love you more each time I read your blogs?! You seem to expose what all of us do-or maybe you are speaking to just me! When the walls come tumbling down, there is so much pain, and the release of them is exhausting, you look back and see the rubble and for me the guilt of the rubble sets in! You have given the answer...God's Free Will...free to decide about Him, and free to put the walls back up-but free...your messages are so powerful in there simplicity and honesty. Have you ever considered writing a book? If you have written one already and I don't know about it, let me know!! I'm so thankful that I receive your blogs!! God Bless you as you continue your journey! Your always in my prayers!!
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Kelli Gotthardt
1/22/2013 08:09:41 am
Karen, what a joy to connect this way! I feel honored to be able to be used by God to connect to your heart. I'm very hopeful we can soon sit around a dinner table together and laugh and cry about Gods work in and around us. And...I've got my first book proposal is being sent to publishers as we speak. You can pray for favor! Thanks for taking the time to encourage me and share some of your heart with me! With love, Kelli
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About Kelli
Kelli is a writer, speaker and consultant equipping leaders for a deepening intimacy with Christ, greater impact in ministry and more effective intentionality in all of life. SpeakingBook Kelli for your next event or retreat.
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